Just now it feels that the only thing my life's got for me is future, and I'm not in it yet. Trying not to daydream-project myself into Boston, the city of my heart, where I long to spend the next four years of my life, at least. There's a memory that comes back to me sometimes, stronger than most -- once it came over me for a brilliant handful of ( Read more... )

Talked to parents about The Great Escape last night; it went both better and worse than I expected, but the best part is that it's over and I don't have to think about it (or panic about the bit where I have to talk to people on purpose about a specific thing, which sends me into fits of terror no matter how benign the subject or how intimately ( Read more... )

I didn't update for days because I had nothing to say, except I do have things to say, loads of them, and yet I can never seem to untangle them into words clear enough to type. And I don't know, exactly, if what I want to say is lovely or dreary, or rain-grey tired, which seems to be what my life is, once again, descending into. I feel tired, and ( Read more... )